Bedrock & Paradox

I dream of a hard and brutal mysticism in which the naked self merges with a non-human world and yet somehow survives still intact, individual, separate. Paradox and bedrock.

Food Throwdown #3!

Yes, three! Late to the party, but we’ll celebrate showing up at all (with a Hoptober Golden Ale, the perfect compliment to the below).
The Missoula-to-Waikiki Express (Pizza)
A whole wheat and stout, thin crust pizza with bison meatballs, jalapeno, orange bell pepper, and pineapple.
The dough is the key, without this, you’re sunk. This makes it an intermediate-advanced pizza.
-Take a bowl, add plenty of yeast, sugar, cold stout from an almost week old growler, and boiling water. 2:1 stout:water ratio. Stir water in a bit at a time so it doesn’t kill the yeast, yet is still hot enough to activate it. If it looks not like this within five minutes, you screwed it up:

-Add a dash of olive oil, a couple shakes of salt, and then add white and whole wheat flour in a 1:3 ratio until the proper consistency is achieved. That is, until you can just handle it with lightly floured hands and not make a huge damn mess of yourself.

-Knead it thoroughly and well on a floured surface.
-Once an even and pleasing texture is achieved (let the force guide you), place in a lightly (olive) oiled bowl, turn once to coat, and secure in a warm place (sunny window ledge, top of the oven) and cover in a damp cloth. Let rise until risen, about 45 minutes (or more, if you like or have the patience).
-In the meantime, prepare bison meatballs. Combine ~1 lb. ground bison (don’t even THINK about using beeeeef), 1 egg, 5-8 shakes balsamic vinegar, 1/8 cup brown sugar, 2 Tbs. Provencal spice mix, generous amounts of salt and pepper, 1/2 cup rolled oats, and a generous pour of Moose Drool or comparable dark beer. Mix well. Form into small meatballs, place on baking sheet, and chill in freezer for ~30 minutes. Then roll lightly in wheat flour and fry in oil on medium heat until cooked. You’ll have lots of extra for sammiches.
-Chop peppers. Don’t get rid of those jalapeno seeds! Fresh from the garden is ideal on both counts. No pickled.
-Open pineapple can. Drain juice.
-Grate desired amount of cheese, approx. 3:2 mozz and fresh block parmesan.
-Open can of sauce (Prego classic, ‘natch).
-Roll dough out by hand on lightly floured surface, then transfer to silicone baking sheet-thing. Remember, pizza dough is like a penis, the more you play with it the harder it gets. Hard pizza dough is not good. Handle as economically as possible. Previsualize. Roll it thin.
-Bake at 450 for 6-7 minutes.
-Remove dough, spread lightly with sauce, then cheese, then toppings in desired pattern.
-Bake another 5-7 minutes at 450, or until done.
-Mange!
-Topping meatballs with sauce is good, but not obligatory. Hoptober Ale or comparable is required. No fucking PBR.

DaveC

One response to “Food Throwdown #3!”

  1. Meredith Avatar
    Meredith

    Three notes -The Kneading part – so you've got your yeast and whatnot in a bowl and it's essentially liquid, so you add enough flour to the bowl of liquid that it forms some sort of very sticky, slightly solid mass, then you flour your work surface, dump the sticky mass out and the kneading is really working more and more flour in till it's not quite sticky anymore, there's no kneading once it has all it's flour added.When you say "Roll" out the dough… I actually do a sort of hand tossing thing, except there's no tossing, just holding it up and moving it around and letting gravity pull the dough out… then it gets laid back down and the edges are squished out, or into a little edge.Third – once it's rolled out, sprinkle olive oil over it lightly before putting the dough in the oven for the pre-bake.P.S. You only really need to chill the meatballs like 15 minutes, just makes them easier to roll in flour without falling apart.

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