Bedrock & Paradox

I dream of a hard and brutal mysticism in which the naked self merges with a non-human world and yet somehow survives still intact, individual, separate. Paradox and bedrock.

Ehhh?!

I noticed this hidden gem on the Cheesteak’s blog earlier, and decided it needed to be highlighted. This would be back in the summer of 2004, escaping Moab summer heat in the San Juans west of Ouray. Summit of either Coffee Pot or Tea Kettle, two little easy 5th volcanic sub-peaks along the ridge near Sneffels. The rope and rack were pretty unnecessary I recall, the real challenge being the big, impressively steep talus slope to gain the ridge in the first place.

Apparently it has a funny and puzzling summit register.

I still have that shirt, too. Wore it this past weekend, in fact. That summer was the beginning of the end of any serious climbing on my part, final nail in the coffin being a final school year of gym climbing in Iowa.

A long time ago, it seems.

That was the subject of our dinner conversation last night, prompted by the grad school crisis: what the hell do I want in life?

In general:
-to stay out west within striking distance of fun stuff and fun people
-to continue with interesting work
-to feel accomplished and satisfied, to know that my days are doing more than keep me in food and bike parts

In particular:
-to further my schooling
-to have more expertise in my current field
-to (in 3-4 years) have a job with more challenges and responsibilities, and more money
-to buy a new car, soon

I can only imagine there’s more, which will come in time as the murky waters dissapate. What was left after we got home last night was a surprising degree of calm and happiness. I’m married to a wonderful woman, have right now and have had in past years a very good life, and each year only seems to get better. Whatever happens with schools this year, it’ll all be worked out for the best. Hopefully in a fairly non-convoluted way, though if it must be, it must be.

You all out there are a major part of why I can roll with the punches and not jump into a beer induced existential crises. Plus, look at the next five weekends!

1: AZSF
2: C2M 100k
3: Rim Ride
4: ______ !
5: Dawn 2 Dusk, Sedona BFL

That’ll do.

DaveC

7 responses to “Ehhh?!”

  1. Meredith Avatar
    Meredith

    Ya know – I think your fashion sense Improves when you don Performance Wear, as opposed to Casual…-Helmet with Ears-Bright Orange Top-Muted brown pants-Bright Blue gaiters that really balance out the top-Black accessories, shoes, harness, etc-Neutral helmet that doesn’t distractI really should give you more credit.

    Reply
  2. Chris Avatar
    Chris

    I feel a lot in common with your general list, not so much the particulars. I need to find my place…

    Reply
  3. Cellarrat Avatar
    Cellarrat

    Nice…Maybe were just all born in the wrong centery?I think i coulda fit being one of the dudes on the open sea or cruising the rivers in 19th centery africa?I donno seems when contentment comes disapointment is to far away =)Can’t wait to ride with yah at the Rim Ride!

    Reply
  4. Dave Avatar
    Dave

    RR’s gonna be a hoot. And warm.A LOT of those guys in Africa died, a lot. Pretty funny reading about the quest to be the first European to visit Timbuktu and return alive.

    Reply
  5. Ed Avatar
    Ed

    So, you KNOW what you want to do when you grow up. I’m jealous.Ed

    Reply
  6. Jonah Avatar
    Jonah

    Have you looked into Naropa in Boulder? Eco-psychology or Env. Leadership program, perhaps. You might like it – I did.

    Reply
  7. Phillip Avatar
    Phillip

    Who are you calling a cheesteak?Was wondering when you would notice that photo. I haven’t been very diligent about updating that file. Found them when I had to move all my files from yahoo photos. Great trip, miss the San Juans! Will be back in Durango this June helping with an AR race, might have to summit something.

    Reply

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